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C-Section Bliss

Posted: November 22nd, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: Birth | Tags: Birth, C-Section | 7 Comments »

I’ve had two pregnancies.  Both were terrible ordeals fraught with constant nausea and vomiting until long after 30 weeks.  I wanted to be a happy while I was pregnant.  I wanted to have that glow and contentment.  I hated pretty much every minute past 6 weeks.  Until the end that is.

With the twins, once I got to the point where I knew a vaginal delivery was probably not the best option, it was an easy decision to decide to have a C-Section.  I’m sure there are many mothers out there who would say I would have been better off delivering Baby A vaginally and hoping Baby B turned on his own.  But what if he didn’t?  The number of OB’s in my practice that would not turn a 2nd baby far outweighed the number who would.  My chances of having a vaginal delivery followed up with an emergency C-Section far outweighed the chances of having a non-eventful vaginal birth of both Baby A and Baby B.  At 35 weeks we set the date.

Considering at the time I was still getting sick every day, covered from head to toe in PUPPPs and carrying an enormous amount of fluid from Polyhydramnios, it was a relief to know my suffering would come to an end in a little over a week.

Call me selfish.

The delivery of the boys went off without a hitch at 36 weeks 1 day- a day before my scheduled C-Section.  I went into spontaneous labor.  Something I was kind of annoyed with at the time (I wanted SOMETHING to go as planned!) but ended up being a good thing.  They came on their own, they were ready.  The doctors wouldn’t have stopped them from coming at this point so I didn’t feel guilty about delivering them so early.  In terms of multiples 36 weeks isn’t really that early.  I know many Moms who deliver much later and I don’t know how they coped those last few weeks- good for them.  I was not a pregnancy Viking.  I was so happy to be done.

Baby B spent about 24 hours in Special Care for observation and frequent feedings- he was just shy (200 grams) of the necessary weight to join his brother.  That was it.  Otherwise I had two healthy babies.  I had Baby A with me in recovery and we all stayed together in my room.  We all came home together and other than many trips for weight checks and bilirubin checks my recovery was swift and easy.

Fast forward 14 months and I am sitting in my midwife’s office and we’re discussing my options for my newest pregnancy.  I’m a good candidate for a VBAC as the reason for my C-Section was a breech Baby B.  I take this in and mull it over for a few weeks.  My Midwife and my OB think a VBAC would be a good choice.  I’m not so sure.

I was quite happy with the birth I had.

Let’s remember I was miserable.  Like crying every day because I was in so much agony miserable.  My Midwife was worried I was going to be a good candidate for PPD I was so miserable.  The instant relief of the C-Section was so amazing, I wouldn’t have changed that for anything.  I think it did have an effect on me and my ability to get through the next few weeks and months, I needed relief.  I needed a break.  I needed something to not be so damn hard.  I don’ t think I could have delivered those boys any other way.

After going back and forth over the next few months, I decided I was going to skip the VBAC.  I know- how many women who WANT this opportunity are never allowed to even think about it and here I am just throwing it away.  Was I insane?  I was thinking about myself again.  And my ability to be a good parent post-delivery.  Things were going the same way they went with the boys- hyperemesis, polyhydramnios, add toddler twins and a full-time job to the mix and it’s a wonder I could see the light at the end of the tunnel.

But there was an end.  39 weeks, 1 day.  It was perfect.  We laughed and cried.  Our son was born (after much pushing and pulling as he was jammed in there pretty good) and after about an hour joined me in the recovery room and went right to the breast where he’s pretty much been ever since.

I wouldn’t change a thing.

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7 Comments on “C-Section Bliss”

  1. 1 Kate said at 2:46 am on November 23rd, 2010:

    I am right there with you Erin. Although I'm 2 kiddos shy of you – my 1 c-section was perfect (after 17 hours of labor). My ob and I discussed it during recovery – I would be a fine candidate for VBAC if I ever want….but I flat out told her no. I was so happy with how smooth it went, and how well I was recovering at the time. I sometimes feel I "cheated" labor – but it worked great. And now with an *almost* 2 year old – I hope for the same experience next time. Although, like you I was a horrible pregnant person…completely miserable. I hated almost every minute of it…I was so happy it was over.

    Good for you…and for those who wouldn't change a thing…that's the best attitude to have. Sometimes things are just meant to happen one way for a reason.

  2. 2 erinclot said at 3:04 am on November 23rd, 2010:

    Sometimes it feels like I *shouldn't* be happy with my births because they weren't natural. I just can't wrap my head around that. I feel like I totally paid my dues up until that moment and then finally I was able to get my reward. It's nice to hear that someone else had a good C-Section experience, I think some (most?) women are afraid to admit that.

  3. 3 Kate said at 6:11 pm on November 23rd, 2010:

    Agreed…it's like it's a sin to be happy with the way your birth turned out if it wasn't natural! But I definetly feel like I "cheated" birth – if that makes sense.

    I'm also of the mindset though – who cares HOW your baby comes out…as long as (s)he does come out – happy and healthy!

  4. 4 erinclot said at 6:07 pm on November 24th, 2010:

    Yes- happy and healthy is key. I would never force a natural birth if it meant putting my child in harms way. Every birth is different and sometimes you just have to do what's best. Now, scheduling a c-section so you don't go into labor at in inconvenient time…well that's a different story!

  5. 5 Brenda said at 10:20 pm on December 6th, 2010:

    I'm so with you on hating pregnancy. I hate the women (figuratively, of course) who say it was the best nine months of their lives. They can have it. After four pregnancies in less than five years, I am so so ready for a hormonal break. pregnancy, PPD, breastfeeding, pregnancy, PPD, breastfeeding. Rinse and repeat a couple more times.

    The way a baby is born is not the measure of motherhood. So what if a baby comes out of the belly instead of the vagina. The kid won't remember or care. They will not measure your love on the method of their birth.

  6. 6 pissinggirls said at 12:39 pm on April 11th, 2011:

    We’re a group of volunteers and opening a new scheme in our community. Your web site offered us with valuable information to work on. You have done an impressive job and our whole community will be thankful to you.

  7. 7 Amanda J. said at 10:10 am on January 30th, 2012:

    I was watching my baby grow and grow each week on ultrasounds—9 lbs+—and I was on the cusp of having to be forced into a Csection. But, I think I would have been okay either way. I think after all we go through in pregnancy, being a little selfish is okay during delivery.
    My recent post Retro-fit Birth Story

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