Just another Minnesota Mom blog.

Choice.

Posted: January 20th, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: Breastfeeding | Tags: Breastfeeding, Feelings | 18 Comments »

There are many choices a mother must make in regards to how to feed her baby:

Do I want to breastfeed?
How far am I going to go to make this work?
Is it better to suffer through it when nothing is working simply to say that I stuck it out?
When it comes down to the well-being of the mother and her newborn, is breast ALWAYS best?

Obviously, if everything works out right off the bat, the other questions are moot.  But today on Twitter it was posed to me that breastfeeding is NOT a choice.

As in, you breastfeed, no matter how hard, no matter what.  End of story.

Easy enough to say, but I disagree.

I’ve had a rough go of it.  This time around has been much better than it was with the twins but it is still rough.  I hope every day that I can make it to 6 months in some capacity.  We are almost there.  then we take our next steps to our long-term goal of one year.

I don’t have it nearly as bad as some women.  Women who deal with terrible latches that leave them cracked and bleeding and begging for relief.  Women who are sent into a downward spiral of PPD spurred on by a baby who is never full and never happy and the constant nagging fear that you are somehow messing up your perfect kid because you can’t get it to work. 

I just have supply issues.

Breastfeeding is a choice.

And the mother who decides, even from day one, that it’s not for her, is no less a mother than the one who runs the marathon and pulls out all the stops to give it a go and make it happen.

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18 Comments on “Choice.”

  1. 1 Colleen Lindstrom said at 9:23 pm on January 20th, 2011:

    Erin, I love you for this! Well said.

  2. 2 erinclot said at 2:57 am on January 21st, 2011:

    I needed a few more than 140 characters to get it out I think.

  3. 3 themamabeth said at 10:02 pm on January 20th, 2011:

    I totally agree! The point is to get the baby fed and healthy, and keep mama healthy and sane.

  4. 4 erinclot said at 2:58 am on January 21st, 2011:

    Yes. Because what is the alternative? Not feeding the baby? I don't think so.

  5. 5 Ashley said at 10:08 pm on January 20th, 2011:

    Thanks for participating in the breastfeeding blog hop! I'm following your blog now.

    @ashley_d00dle

  6. 6 erinclot said at 2:58 am on January 21st, 2011:

    Thanks for following!

  7. 7 Amira said at 1:03 am on January 21st, 2011:

    Great post! I really feel for people who have a hard time with breastfeeding and have decided to donate some of my milk to a local mom so her baby can also have breast milk! People in general are way to quick to judge! All moms are doing the best they can for their baby!

  8. 8 erinclot said at 3:01 am on January 21st, 2011:

    Yes! How can you judge something like this- you don't know the backstory just by observing a baby being fed with a bottle. Sadly, it's something many women jump all over. It's a huge guilt thing for me, that it didn't work with the boys and I need it to work so bad this time around. I've had to give up exclusively breastfeeding because he's a totaly tank, but we're working on it. And it's hard. And I know it's going to end at some point because other things are important too.

  9. 9 Amira said at 1:24 am on January 27th, 2011:

    If you feel comfortable giving your baby someone else's breastmilk you should check and see if there is and "Eats on Feets" near you http://www.eatsonfeets.org/

  10. 10 Jen J. said at 5:39 am on January 21st, 2011:

    I feel the same way! I’m all for promoting breastfeeding, but it’s not for everyone. I think it’s important we support each other as parents.

  11. 11 erinclot said at 12:18 pm on January 21st, 2011:

    Yes! Support!

  12. 12 Jamie said at 11:33 am on January 21st, 2011:

    I totally agree! I chose not to breastfeed my first two because my experience with my son (my firstborn) was horrible. I gave it another try with our 3rd baby, and we've been breastfeeding exclusively for the 3 months since she's been born. It was very hard at first and I'm happy I stuck it out because now I love it, but I am a different person and parent this time around. Having been on both sides of the fence, I never judge anyone for choosing not to breastfeed. For some women, it isn't even a choice because they just don't have the supply or various other reasons. I am definitely pro-breastfeeding but if you don't do it, you're not any less of a mom! Thanks for posting.

    Just stopped by on the Breastfeeding blog hop. I'm following you now. Please come say hi. http://tripledutymomma.com

  13. 13 IThoughtIKnewMama said at 5:46 pm on January 21st, 2011:

    Following you here and on Twitter via the Breastfeeding Blog Hop.

    I think breastfeeding is best whenever possible without a doubt, but it's definitely not for everyone. I was not breastfed, and neither were most people I know – it wasn't popular for that generation – and we're all ok 😉 BUT, I LOVE that I breastfeed my son and I am a big advocate of breastfeeding when it's possible. The most important thing though is that parents are loving and make good choices for their kids and get the support they need!

  14. 14 erinclot said at 6:36 pm on January 21st, 2011:

    I know- I wasn't breastfed, it didn't work out for me. My sister was a totaly breastfeeding champ. I think you have to figure out what works for you. I LOVe to breastfeed Judah- he's awesome. The twins? Most frustrating 4 months of my life. I remember nothing from the first three months that did not involve me, the couch, a pump, a boob or a crying baby. It was a crappy way to start out being a Mom. I wish I had the courage to callit quits earlier then, but it's the most guilt inducing part of being a Mom- that "failure" of mine.

  15. 15 sarahpv said at 6:33 pm on January 21st, 2011:

    Agreed…I thought it would be a piece of cake to breastfeed…it wasn't. Twins. Premature.NICU. it didn't happen. I felt like a failure…I don't need other people rubbing it in…I already feel it enough. I think breastfeeding is WONDERFUL, but back up off the formula!

  16. 16 erinclot said at 2:45 am on January 22nd, 2011:

    I thought I was really prepared, knew all of the things that could go wrong and it's like I knew too much. Nothing worked right. And you are right- back off the formula, what is the other option!

  17. 17 Juliea said at 11:16 am on January 22nd, 2011:

    Stopping over from the breastfeeding blog hop!

    I see what you are saying here. I do hope you make it to your goal! I think I may have chosen you out of the people listed on the blog hop for a reason because I actually make cookies that help with milk production. There are actually a couple of blogs doing giveaways for $20. to my Etsy shop (where I sell the cookies and more stuff).

    Here are the link the the blogs: http://themilkmama.com/2011/01/20/review-and-give… (this one just started but it's her first giveaway and it's offf to a VERY slow start – so chances are really high on this one.)

    And – http://beadeclectic.blogspot.com/2011/01/100th-bl… (another first giveaway, but it's going well!)

    Hope you're having a fabulous weekend. The recipe for the cookies also is posted around and they really do increase milk for most women.

    <3 Juliea

  18. 18 Dumb comments and the unsupportive lactivist | The Slacker Mom said at 2:45 am on August 25th, 2011:

    […] is already throwing everything but the kitchen sink at the issue that she’s not doing enough. Every woman makes the choice. When to say when. When is it too much. At what point is it not worth the struggle. Everyone has […]


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