I’ve been swimming. A lot.
Well, maybe not *alot a lot* but three mornings a week you will find me in the pool.
I remember back when I was in high school on the swim team and I used to suss out my homework assignments in my head while I wove back and forth endlessly every afternoon at practice. Back and forth, back and forth. Your mind tends to wonder.
Lately I’ve been trying to block out the chatter and just focus on nothing.
I’m having a hard time with it.
Because I have a hard time thinking of nothing I try and focus on what length of the pool I am on. I strive for 1600 meters, 64 lengths, 32 laps.
This is a glimpse of today:
24 24 24 24 24 24 Is that girl going faster than me? She wasn’t going that fast before. This isn’t a race. I don’t care how fast anyone else goes. Don’t focus on her. Do a flip-turn. Flip turns aren’t hard.
What number am I on? 25 25 25 25 25 25 25 25 what do I need to get at Target? Kool-Aid and milk? I hope no one thinks I am giving my kids Kool-Aid. I barely give them watered down juice let alone Kool-Aid. 25 25 25
26 26 26 26 26 26 26 26 26 What am I doing next? Breast stroke? 26 26 26 26 Now that girl is doing flip turns too! Why is she doing flip turns when she wasn’t doing them before? Focus on something else. What lap is this? 26? Odd down, even back. 26.
27 27 27 Did that guy get out of the pool? The one who uses the paddles and weaves all over the lane? Yep I think he’s gone. Just me and this girl. Or is the water jogger still over there? I can’t see. Remember to cancel the eye appointment so you can go to the Great Cloth Diaper Change. Remember remember remember…
What number am I on? 27 27 27 27 27 wait. Odd down, even back…28 28 28 28 28 focus on the fucking number stop thinking about all this other stuff. 28 28 28 28 28
29 29 29 29 29 29 29 29…
30 30 30 I wonder if I should dye the woolies straight green or get some Ice Blue to add? 30 30 30 30 30 30 am I too close to get another stroke in? Yes, too close.
That was terrible. Watch the floor and count your strokes. 31 31 31 31 Crap I have water in my goggles. What is happening during these flip turns? Should I stop at the other end? No just get through 32 and then kick. 31 31
32 32 32 32 32 I can’t see what the eff. Maybe if I close my ey- no that doesn’t really work in a pool. What number am I on? 32? Halfway? Ok, power until the end and now let’s stop and get the kick board…
And on and on and on.
I need to figure out how to turn it off. I need to be able to tune everyone else in the pool out instead of being keenly aware of their every move.
How do you tune out and focus?