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Stuck in Neutral | The Slacker Mom

Stuck in Neutral

by Erin Clotfelter on 04/25/2012

I am failing miserably.

I keep messing around with my goals on My Fitness Pal.  (More calories?  Less calories? More protein?  More carbs?)

I keep skipping days at the pool.

I keep going over on calories (and not with good foods).

I keep putting off entering my food on MFP.

I am frustrated with how hard this is for me and how easy it has been for my husband.  (For reference, we started the same time and I have lost maybe 6 pounds and he has lost 30.  Thirty.  As in five times as much as I have.)

If I’m being honest, it pisses me off.  Not that he’s lost the weight- I’m glad for him.  But that it’s seemingly so much easier for him.

But this isn’t his first rodeo.  He’s had weight loss goals before and he always drops the pounds.  I have never really taken this seriously before, never carried anything out past flipping through a book and maybe changing a few things in my diet for a few weeks.

Nothing like this.

It’s just bizarre that I can go to the gym and work my ass off in the pool for an hour and then come home and eat a salad with cranberries, poached chicken and fat free dressing and not budge on the scale.  It’s maddening.

So I need to reevaluate.  Am  sabotaging myself?  Do I need to add more calories back in?  It seems like the weeks I saw the best results were the weeks I had splurge days.

I am going to do two things.

First, I am changing my goal so it’s something within reach so I don’t have to look at that 46 over there on my sidebar and feel like a failure.  I’m changing to 10 pound goals.  I need the reinforcement of reaching a milestone otherwise I’m just hanging out here saying “fuck it” because nothing is happening anyways.

I am also going to ramp my calories back up.  I’m going to give that a month and see what happens.  If I see progress that way, we’ll stick with that but I have to stop playing around with my numbers hoping that something is going to click.  At 1600 calories I would still be on track to lose 1 pound a week which is my goal.

So there it is.

Tell me I’m not crazy.  Tell me to keep going!  Tell me how to deal with a partner who is having amazing success while I am stuck in neutral.

 

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{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

1 leah @maritalbless April 25, 2012 at 12:08 pm

You CAN do this and you are NOT crazy.

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2 Madizzysmum April 25, 2012 at 12:31 pm

You can do it!
If you have a craving for something "naughty" have a some just don't go overboard, but keep up the exercise even if it's just a brisk walk and some sit ups. Also focus on eating whole wheat foods, so yummy foods (pasta, bread etc) that fill you up as well as protein etc, you want a diet that you can do forever not just for the next 3 months. And remember loosing slower is better =).

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3 Jessica April 25, 2012 at 12:48 pm

Well first, men always lose faster than women, so don't count that against your own efforts. Second, instead of calories, focus on WHAT you are eating instead. I highly recommend this: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/about-2/mark-sisso…. It's how Neil and I started our journey. No counting, no scales.

Oh, and NO wheat.

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4 Carrie April 25, 2012 at 1:22 pm

You are not failing miserably!

Guys generally have a much faster weight loss. It drove me nuts with my husband, too! But here's the thing… of course they can meet their goals quickly if they've done it before and know what to do. However, does losing it like that stick? For me, no. Now that I'm losing it more slowly than I ever have in my life, I'm also slowly changing habits. Which means it's more likely to stick. I'm living like I will *after* losing it so I can really maintain.

Also, I use something similarly to MFP and I often (read: more than not) go over. I did change it to 2 lb/wk weight loss, but I know I'm not going to do that… But at least seeing the same amount over as I did when it was on a 1lb a week weight loss means that I'm not going over as much. ;-)

I think your decision to take it 10 lbs at a time is a good one! Any goal is easier when we break it up into chunks. I do a 5 lb mark and give myself a "reward" at each 5 lb.

You can do it! Cheers

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5 Marta28 April 25, 2012 at 10:06 pm

You can do it!

Its totally frustrating I've only been doing it for 6 weeks so far (inspired by you) and I lost 5 lbs right away. And then I gained it back and then I lost it again and then i've been plateaued at the same weight for almost 2 weeks. And I'm working SO hard. Its driving me crazy. Its too early in the process to already be stagnated. So I haven't been to the gym since Saturday. And ate terribly at Happy Hour yesterday. Its so hard to stay on track when the results aren't coming. I think we can do it though. I think you have the right idea to break it up in increments instead of the full goal.
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6 Janine April 26, 2012 at 12:37 am

I am having the hardest time losing weigh too. I usually either count calories strictly, or eat only 'clean' foods, or eating more loosely and working out hard. I think it's time I'll have to do them all together! You can't call it baby weight anymore when your kid is almost 2!

I think that for you, restricting calories with a couple cheat days a week could work for you! I used to do that before I had Sebastian and had really good results — It's what many body builders do to cut weight. (I'm no expert and don't know your body, but just based on what you said.) If it makes you feel better, I haven't even been able to keep six pounds off!
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